i just fell asleep at my computer and i woke up and in the google bar it said delicious foods to eat
Do the low cut shirt test. If he stares at your tits even in front of your brother, he's down.
i googled waterboarding like you asked. as long as you do it outside. we have carpet. but i wont be a part of it.
Don't know how I even got in. I pulled my id out and threw it at the bouncer, and he just picked it up, checked it, and let me in.
This guy in a neck brace is ordering bottle service at the strip club. Not sure whether to applaud his commitment or scorn his addiction. It's a draw.
I got us chalkboard mugs. Now whoever comes home with us can feel comfortable in the morning! I am too considerate to my one-night stands...
How could I forget your birthday? I have an alarm in my phone to ask you for sex that day.
WTF YOU SHOULDNT BREAK A SWEAT TAKING A SHIT. MY BODY HATES ME.
Judging by my bruises, I know I took more than one tumble. I probably pulled u down w me, and then punched you in the knee. Been trying to find a place to fix my phone between naps today. Almost no place accepts hand js as currency these days. 2013 is gonna be expensive and whorey.
In my dream, you became a famous tap-dancer. Congratulations.
I'm high and I have a consensual booty call on the way and just thought that it was a good time to let you know that I think that you are a stellar person.
I'm still laying in bed cuz I don't feel like adulting yet
And Mike keeps telling Will that love at first sight is true and this is just a shit show. Help.
I was at his place until 2am. We just sat really close an stared at each other. I think you are right. Germans must not have feelings. Not even tingly ones in their pants.
you started putting peanut butter on your pubes.
Randomize
