New moon trailer came on. Theater booed. I love these people.
part of me always dies a little when i go to the "2 women seeking 1 man" section in craigslist's casual encounters to find nothing there. it's tragic
I just found a bottle of gin in my vegetable crisper. Party is back on.
Sounds good. Stay safe. I'm kind of drunk in a Food 4 Less right now and I'm having the time of my life.
Dude, this is like the 4th time today I've had to use cruise control for a 25mph zone. This hangover is never fucking gonna end.
I might have been the first person to be rolling balls at a referee seminar
Well, my eyeball is red and the rest of my eye is black. Oh the joys of drinking with u. PS- I laid in a pile of sawdust. it was ok at the time.
I spent the day drinking wine and meditating. I'm zen as fuck.
Do you participate in Sunday morning booty calls?
Dammit! I didn't see this message, of course I do.
You think you're smart. You're pretending to be asleep to save yourself from my hormonal pms mood swings. Unfortunately that only works against bears.
Locals got pissed I was talking to the barmaid. Tried to tell me that they keep all the good beer at "a Soho walkup" Google saved me
I need something for rope burns and an inner ear infection. Separate incidents, FYI..
Glass of stolen champagne in a to go cup = tastiest hangover cure ever
We were too tired to finish having sex so we just stopped to eat the cheesecake and passed out. I didn't mind
Dude I pissed in her little brother's closet and when I tried to flush the doorknob her parents came out and saw me standing there naked, no more ambien for me
Randomize
