Shame should no longer be a word in your vocabulary.
How many bratwuest were you able to fit in your mouth at one time? It's me, Hans.
Just had to pull out another loan to pay for that public drunkenness citation. I am so ready to graduate.
2nd fun fact: he has a square tan line around his dick.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I told him if I was pregnant we were coming out to the people at work, because I'm not pretending to get knocked up by an imaginary boyfriend.
yeah dropping that class because i really don't want to be known as the girl who fell asleep in class and threw up as she walked out for an entire semester
Now you know my pain. Live with it. Own it. Recognize it. Cause its like shitting napalm.
Let me be the vehicle for you to live out your slutty half-gay dreams.
I woke up and my backpack was empty. He used me for sex, and back to school supplies.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I tried to trade my phone for pizza last night. I guess I had priorities last night
She showed me her tits outside Taco Bell....After she flashed the dude working there in an effort to get in.
dude, i told you to rally, so you sprinted upstairs, knocked some girl down, and without missing a beat said, "not now bitch, im in the fucking zone" and took off
I think I'm gunna glue a sign to my head that says "WAKE ME UP BEFORE 7!" And go to sleep and hope a kind passer by wakes me up for my exam .
Legit just looked at the gin bottle and said, “Aw fuck, I’m going to feel this in the morning.”
Soon to be ex is nowhere to be found. Her attorney/new BF just showed up. 30 minutes late looking hungover. Pretty sure I'm getting the kids AND the house!
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