Where you are. You must stay where you are are
Where you are. You must stay where you are arewhere are youu
Where you are. You must stay where you 5eare wher are you!!
he found you with your pants down, trying to straddle the urinal. no one should have to see their sister like that. ever.
Okay! I've got my sketchbook, my purse, my coat, and a knife hidden in my cleavage. I'm ready for to meet my blind date~
He stopped mid-sex to read the subtitles on a Korean movie we had playing in the background.
Girl we've come a long way since our first Brazilian wax
We need to figure out what we are doing for halloween asap. I'm not going out like a punk ass bitch burger king again this year.
The real reason I can't work: it's Tuesday. I get stoned and watch Buck Rodgers on Tuesday.
The majority of the reason I want to get my pilot's license is so I can use the argument "FUCK YOU! I'M A PILOT!"
I need to be put in a corner surrounded by pamphlets of stds and babies
I'm at the back whiskey bar with a 7 and 7 in a winnie the pooh costume. Come find me.
I told him you're making deviled eggs for the party. Sisters make deviled eggs to get their sisters laid. It's science.
They're gonna put "is a hoe" on my medical records
I'm SO high. And there is so much pudding in this car
I really wanna treat my body good. Because i plan on doing drugs
i made that whipped coffee shit today. took six pouches of instant espresso.
please tell me you didn’t consume six shots of espresso
:)
i can feel colors
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