i need a lesbian romance or unplanned pregnancy for some spicein my life.
Why do guys in porn never have boxers on?
better question: why do you always text me when you're watching porn
my facebook is like a giant collection of my one night stands
I just realized. my grades aren't ready for st patties day...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He tried to cuddle with me after we hooked up and i just looked at him and said why are you still here?
She liked to slap me in the face while she was on top. All I can say is that big boobs can excuse a lot.
High with mom again. She's giving me relationship advice.
Why do you have an empty bottle of port in your bathroom bin?
Got another job?
If by job you mean clever way of getting free tattoos, then yes. I got another job.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I really should have gone with the man who kept offering me cocaine. Why did I chose the German!? STUPID!
Last night turned out to be an expensive trip to your house between the ticket and the plan b. (Well I haven't gotten that yet)
You did a cartwheel, it was terrible.
I remember that cartwheel, it was okay.
Literally just sitting around waiting for someone to come along and fuck my chakras back into alignment
On a scale of 1-10 how inappropriate is it for me to ask if Walgreens offers teacher discounts when purchasing a Plan B pill?
You took the glass microwave plate and said it was the closest thing to a frisbee, let me know how that works out for you
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