I got wasted for the 1st time and I sat in a fridge for 2 hours and a trash can?
I think tonya harding is in my dwi class!
Ask her how she and Jeff Gillooly split the cats after the divorce.
there are definitely too many half naked pictures of me out there for me to ever be famous.
Say something about gay babies.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I feel like a combination of david goes to the dentist and drunkest guy ever goes for more beer
There's been so much talk around your vagina it's like a local celebrity
I pretty much threw up on him while he slept, I had one task today which was to wash the sheets that I threw up on and I turned them pink. I would leave me if I could
I was going to make out with him...then he licked syrup off the kitchen floor.
Any man who has a face like that and a bike, deserves a vagina like yours permanently.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
All I've succeeded in doing since I saw you is drool on my shoulder
We are gunna have the best winter break smoking weed and eating ham
Are you doing trivia tonite? Also sorry I peed on you.
He goes to Columbia so regardless of how he looks I should fuck him right?
He does impressions. Handy knowing you can get fucked by one guy and pretend a group of celebrities is running a train on you.
it was an ACCIDENT
it was a DICK
Randomize