But do you think a lot of ppl use facebook as a masturbation supplement to porn?
Let me make clear that I am not a facebook masturbator
Also my back is semi rug burned and I'm holding you fully responsible.
I would love to give you more rug burn
Annihilated within 20 minutes of arriving on Saturday, proceeded to hook up with him half a dozen times/almost have sex in the shed. Later on I text his boyfriend letting him know he's okay and that he's asleep next to me. If I could parlay this skill into a vital component of national security I'd be the Jack Bauer of homewrecking. Diner later?
PS: the photo I uploaded for this internship site is the same one i used for my fake ID. I like to keep it classy.
We thought she was passed out on the toilet, but she raised her head to tell me the word I couldn't remember was "empathize." Then she puked blood and passed out.
i understand you have values and thats awesome, all i want to help you do is forget about them breifly
I DON'T WANT TO DEMONSTRATE MY DICK TAKING ABILITIES WITH MY MOM THERE.
There is blood on my sheets, we apparently used 8 towels, everything in my shower is knocked down. Wut?
Jesus Christ I am the crazy cat lady of vibrators
I just tried to pay for a coffee with a dollar and a necco wafer.
Pretty sure I just noped a member of the Canadian women's hockey team on Tinder.
The best thing about this time of year is that all I have to do is add a random mardi gras decoration to my cart full of alcohol and boom, no more judging
How the fuck did he think me asking about the possibility of a threesome was a rhetorical question?
That was my first party and they were so suprised that this little freshman girl was a FUCKING BEER PONG QUEEN.
He just blew a .079. Jesus loves him THAT much.
Randomize
