Picture the opening band right now: euro, beer guts, one member in oversized hipster lumberjack apparel, the other in childsized american apparel and shorts. Singing in german.
and those juicy C cups turned out to be oddly-shaped A's when her padded bra came off.
I just heard a guy scream "it must be five o' clock!!" and another guy screamed "somewhere!!!" out from different balconies.
My therapist says she wants to work on my 'trust issues'. I think she's found the cash cow within.
i just had to wipe vomit off my fone to text you. yeah that hungover.
He came in asked for the bathroom and came out 10 minutes later dripping wet took his redbull and left.
i am one more weekend without sex away from dosing him with viagra and locking ourselves into a closet.
On an unrelated side note: I shall now attempt to crawl to the bathroom. Where I will lay motionless on the cold ceramic bathtub with hot water pouring over my shivering body as I desperately try not to vomit. Good day.
I lost it last night. That was humiliating. Cincinnati is now covered in my puke.
You pissed off the back deck while listening to the national anthem from your phone screaming America Fuck Yea to my neighbors
why isn't there a kind of gay where i let guys give me head but they don't expect me to give it back? i could be that kind of gay
He was that good?
I'm really glad I had vomit on my sweater when I met his sister.
She told me "I think I'm going to puke tonight" a few seconds later she said smiling"I can't wait!"
Good dick will make you do a lot of things… Great dick will make you consider buying a house.
Came out of blackout state to the curtains torn down & the headboard laid on top of him. & yes he was still breathing
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