I kept calling his name while we were having sex cuz i was so proud that i remembered it.
It' a whole new level of walk of shame. I'm carrying his sheets since I have a washer/dryer.
of all places to pass out....why right in front of our RA's door? OF ALL PLACES.
He just "revenge puked" on her kid. I think we'll be leaving soon.
I just googled if crying burns calories
1. Are there men involved 2. Is there food involved 3. Do I have to put pants on 4. Do I have to leave this bed
Be subtle and tell lucas that he should sleep here tonight. And by subtle, i mean show him this text...
We're all getting matching jack daniels tattoos. We're gonna be an alcoholic gang of awesome.
We woke up at 7:30am. We got a 30 rack, yelled at all the freshman shackers walkin back to their dorms, played a game of beer die, and boned all before 11:00am. I found my soulmate
A man in a black on black escalade pulled up next to me, and told me he was sent to pick me up by you.
His name is Tyreece. He will take you to the weed emporium, population me.
The crooked penis I maybe could have looked past...but no foreplay? Deal breaker.
We were sad, then we got horny, and then we needed some ranch
We just fucked in the park on a bench and a guy with a dog walked past us and the dog walked right up to us while the guy stared at his phone.
Just walked out of the train bathroom after having sex and got a round of applause from the passengers. Definitely the best part of the trip.
Sorry I banged your sister. But in my defense you ain't fucked me in a month. In fact I should get a medal for keeping it in your family.
Randomize
