one might say we're banned from that church
If I don't wake up snuggled up to 14 ice cream sandwiches, my life is incomplete.
I'd be more interested in girls if they were more interested in anal.
How long is it safe to eat only Hot Pockets and Popsicles?
He gave me a pearl necklace on top of my Karma necklace I was wearing. I guess I deserve whats coming to me.
Somehow I don't trust you in this state to talk to you about a colonoscopy
We still need to grow old, buy a house, and drink 40's while wearing old people sunglasses, staring at the young studs mowing our lawn.
Dude you went around coming up behind people and whispering in their ears. I dont know what you said but they looked terrified when you left.
I just realized that the thing that smelled like an electrical fire in my house was me.
And I just realized we will be at a strip club when the end of the world is supposed to happen. This is destiny
Just successfully invited my mom to a drag show. If that doesnt say "im gay" then idk what will.
He pretended his dick was a samurai sword and that he was slaying me with it is it bad I still wanted him to fuck me
listen. i haven't sucked a dick in well over three years but i believe in myself.
I still dont see how i drunkenly impressed your mom
RICK FUCKING MORANIS!!!!!
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