Also, I'm sitting at a crosswalk watching two Mexican gangs fight each other. I miss you too. A lot.
is it true that cum stays in you for 7 years?
that's gum
Yeah dude I should be out of the ER in about an hr. They gave me vallium. Go tell the captain its time to set sail.
Luckily my prof thought I was puking from nerves and gave me motivational mini speeches the entire final.
stop calling me dude. finger blasting me officially kills you being able to call me dude.
Every time you blow me I should make a paper crane and we'll make them into a chain and hang them from the ceiling. And then whenever we have people over and they ask what the cranes are for I'll say "reminders" and wink at you.
Although I feel like awkward kinda describes your entire sexual history...
Could have been worst, could have seen me bent over biting her carpet while her son was inside me, i think i would have respnded with "i was just trying to be quiet"
Let's celebrate that I used a condom
can I cover your dick in cookie butter?
I have never encountered a chode in the wild
extra points if i make kids and or the elderly cry
Not drinking until my bday. I know it's only a few days but it feels like when couples get celibate before the wedding and there's all that tension.
he went down on me WHILE i ate BACON PIZZA! best. boyfriend. ever.
So do you guys remember Danny from Tinder?
Sorry I only remember personality traits, not names.
Randomize
