the girl I was having sex with just mumbled victory for msu during sex. i love basketball season
Worst hangover of my career vs the return of the blue balls. Will keep updated
We played "race the Jimmy John's driver". Order, then see if we can finish sex before the food arrives.
Its only fair we share our golden vaginas with the world. It would be selfish if we didn't.
It's not a good night until someone eats a bagel covered in face mask thinking it's cream cheese
Just lifeguarded a kid's party hungover so I could afford to go out drinking tonight. Circle of life shit goin on here.
I'm so in the Halloween spirit, I zombified my all of my nudes on my phone. Tell me this isn't creative.
We were walking up the stairs and I asked Dominick what floor the party was on. The cop who had just tried breaking it up was walking down the stairs, drinking a slurpee, and answered, "Third floor."
Well be careful man. Be careful. Wear shoes in the house. Safety. Safety first, then teamwork.
He is like the "hometown sweetheart", but a huge freak. Like "I'll come change your flat tire"....but then fuck you like an animal in the back seat.
Currently at a fetish club with a set of swings (don't ask). Having flashbacks to the park by my house
all we have is white fucking wine this is a travesty it's christmas not a fucking funeral
"I'm 95% straight," he says. Cut to him on his knees...by far the most beautiful guy I've ever fucked.
You let someone poor beer into my mouth off of a balcony. Best friend test failed.
Haahahahahahhaaa
He brought me a bottle of Jack, got me off 3 times, & then left. This is the best fakelationship ever!
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