my mouth tastes like poor choices
he just told me about his fetish for rubbing grape jelly on his penis.
I just applied for an unsubsidized loan naked. I love the internet.
waiting in line for my ID. the kid in front of me reaks of hopes and dreams and hornyness-- freshmen by calvin klein
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i think you broke pat's ankle when you drove over it... he's freaking out but on a more serious note i'm 99% sure i saw a werewolf
You need to tell your booty call to take some sudafed or something. I swear I thought you were humping Kermit the frog last night
about to tell this girl that sh'es my teenage dream. you have 15.358s to stop me.
3 girls crying in the bathroom at the bar. Its like a Christmas song
In a weird way, I don't want to stalk him on Facebook. I want to find out what's wrong with him the old-fashioned way. Is this what it means to be romantic?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Hey I'm not sure why your jacket's covered in maple syrup but I just realized you didn't leave the house earlier wearing a jacket...
The man who lives downstairs is fluent in Russian, and also a playboy. You should meet.
We're taking a shot every time Landon Donovan takes a shot. It's clever, sort of.
Question. There's no better feeling than clean shaven balls. Do girls get that too?
It's a sad statement on my day when the high point was getting a pap test.
He left a fire sauce packet from taco bell that said "promise you'll text me in the morning" on my nightstand.
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