I wanna crawl in your skin and have dreams about Bobby Kennedy tonight.
Capitaan dildo arrescate!
suntimes in life you find a rare opportunity, mine was bonin my gf in front of the tv
I just foul balled at work. I had taken off my coat too… had to go to the sink wash my hands then go back to the stall and pick up my coat. I hope the guy shitting in the stall next to me didn’t figure out what happened.
Its only fair we share our golden vaginas with the world. It would be selfish if we didn't.
I was just laying in bed wondering if there's more important things in life than cheese stuffed pretzels.
I miss you too. And it was nice meeting your brother while I was mounting you
He broke into my house just to tell me the door was locked.
Cory and I accidentally had a sexual adventure last night.
How do you ACCIDENTALLY have a sexual adventure?
Thank god for federal credentials. Waaaaayyyy to hungover to go through airport security lines right now.
You're about wine.
Yes, I'm like 90% wine at the moment
nothing out of the ordinary. you aplogized for having a spicy vagina and passed out
The poop emoji wasn't even in my recents. Does that mean I'm growing up?
I told him I was on my period but he says "I'm a doctor, you think I can't handle blood?" And just went for it. Jackpot
I’ve slept with a Senior, a Freshman and a Junior so far. I’m a Sophomore away from hitting for the cycle
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