there are 10 yearolds here who keep calling me on the elbow rule!
Wait are they playing beer pong to?
he just came in and straightened the chair and left again
Did you just say he wants to put a baby inside me?
Just had a memory of you pretending to be a begging dog putting your head on my lap while I fed you. Great night to try a new drug.
I was tackling you out of excitement
Yeah thank goodness the stripper pole was there to break my fall.
I tried to lock you in the bathroom stall because you were too drunk. But you escaped from underneath, I gave up
Watching frozen planet. There's a beach master sea lion with about 50 sea lion bitches fighting another sea lion for said bitches. It's a bloody battle. Dude. You have over 50. Share.
What time do you think you'll be heterosexual?
Just found weed in an empty handle. Who knew Capitan Morgan was also a gardener?
I'm getting offered Candy Crush lives in return for sex. Like wtf.
We could get her a gift basket of Xanax l
It was 16 hours of liver killing mistake making goodness
It only takes one line of cocaine, and you try to shotput a fucking kitchen table
I can't dude. Last time I was there, I blew the bartender in the bathroom at last call.
So being hungover in an office full of people with hangovers for 9 hours is quite possibly what hell will be like.
Randomize
