Hey babe, chan wants you to stop texting her about the size of TJ's dick. please.
there's nothing like watching the sun rise at the library alone on a friday morning to make you want to kill yourself.
Party at my house. Liquor pinata. Your presence is required.
hey, i'm all for honesty but let's not get carried away
Just realized my talking to the tv hockey voice is same as my sex voice. Life just got a whole lot weirder.
It's official, I've know hooked up with everyone I carpooled with in middle school
you cried when she wouldn't let you have her bathroom rug.
Pillow talk just revealed that he originally thought I was 16.
hiding in a bush to avoid a seven dollar cab ride. cabby got out a flashlight and looked for us for like an hour. help.
I asked her to make me water, which in turn meant get me a glass. She handed me a cup of microwaved ice cubes.
Just had the "whores are people too" talk with Mom. Bright side it's Christmas, and I may have been drunk, I don't think she caught on.
I feel like drug tests are a little less "random" when you are employed by your father.
I think I've forgotten how to blink. Help plz?
Oh I fucked him, definitely. We played Strip Halo.
I managed all three standard threesome configurations a female-bodied person can achieve in just under nine years. I want to high-five everyone involved, but I've lost touch with a couple of them
Randomize
