I woke up at 5am and he was watching me sleep... Come get meee!!??
This is a mass text. Does anyone know what the hell the asian woman at the end of Napoleon Dynamite is doing in the movie
At barnes & noble, drinking beer out of thermoses, lookin legit.
I woke up face down on my laptop with three windows open: itunes, chat roulette and redtube
well seeing as i got a call at 5 am from the hotel manager telling me my cousin was passed out on the lobby floor...not good
I don't remember her missing an ear while we were at the bar
The calves of my jeans are covered in jello shots from Sunday, how desperate do I have to be before I start licking them?
The cab driver doesn't know where we can find an empire state building shaped dildo either!? What is wrong with NYC!?
i feel like this needs to be a 'lose some teeth' kind of weekend.
Stripper pole. Sore legs. More vaca money.
Freshman Move In Day, its like Christmas in August.
Dude, how the hell did you become an RA?
Yeah i was handcuffed to the bed all night but i actually slept like a baby
Holy crap, church bells in Cibolo just scared the hell out of me. I'm pretty sure they were yelling sinner at me.
There's a ton of international students in my suite and I'm just sitting in this chair with no pants on eating frosted flakes
you are singlehandedly the most cursed object the universe ever conceived
Randomize