Hahaha figures, hmm should I spank you? Or throw a cow at you?
pedialite and red bull = repair kit
I was so drunk i thought Kathy Griffin was funny
She transformed our coors light pitcher we stole from the bar into a fruit basket...
let's skip the party, and just play drunken wii, again. its time to give my vag a break.
I wonder what gingers are like in bed...as awkward as their hair or just as unique as it...?
Drunk man just did a hand stand, fell over, knocked over a whole table of desserts, and didnt lose his cowboy hat. winner.
He took me to the bathroom in the gay bar to "just cuddle." Fool me once, shame on you. Fool me twice...well...
if that blanket by the dog bowl was your dog's "bed" then i apologize to bailey for having sex on it
And I'm ok with his balls touching my ass
You're really doing everyone a disservice by wearing pants all the time.
so I guess I made a note in my phone last night to remind myself not to do shrooms on the cruise ship
I am literally drinking 7 day old water and looking for snacks in my room so I won't have to go in the hall and see roommate, because we accidentally banged last night. Please bring over some chicken and plan b.
It's only funny because he thinks you had sex with him to rob him.
It was somewhere in between an airport security patdown and a medical examination. No groping or squeezing, just brief pokes and pats.
Randomize
