ive never been so in love with another man before, in a totally none sexual way... no homo
Dude I just peed on my pants. not in them though. and yes there is a difference
He saved me in his phone as Easy Jen. Should I be offended?
I wouldn't worry about it. He has me as "Sex Puppet."
you might want to delete the history when you're done using the computer at work. did you ever find out what the white balls in your throat were?
i woke up this morning to a slap on the ass and jake saying "you should let me put it in your ass now" i need out of this relationship.
for sure. did you let him do it?
thats not the point.
It's like sleeping with someone you met at a karaoke bar. It's never okay.
So, apparently, "i expected your penis to be bigger" isn't good pillow talk.
im flying all the way to minnesota to see him for four days... cutest-best-friend-reunion or most-epic-booty-call-ever?
who says it cant be both...
how do you say "fuck me and leave bruises" in italian?
I'm chugging Gatorade because i drank something called a trashcan and someone named Gianna diamond has my credit card number, and I think I might have ruined my life.
What's the politically correct way of saying you've made someone your bitch?
Henceforth: booty calls will now be referred to as "deliveries of anatomy". That is all.
I'm shopping for Mother's Day cards while waiting for my herpes medication. What is life.
that is either the most profound and meaningful thing i've ever heard, or someone got high before noon again.
First she snuck beer into the movies and then proceded to give me a handjob in the dark theatre. I think I'm in love
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