My dick has been asking about u. He said he didn't do anything wrong n I'm a dumbass
He's trying to wipe up all the spilled drinks with a banana
He told me that he wanted to break up with his girl friend but only after we had sex, only for him to make sure I'm worth it..
I want something that's relevant to him banging her right after I did. Like "runner-up"
She devotes each year to either men or women. I waited all year for her to be straight, tonights the night.
Is it awkward to ask someone I've slept with to officiate my wedding?
Those foam number one hands, are the BEST socks.
hey dude come in here and see how much of my beard i can put in my mouth!
We dared each other to drink Arbor Mist, and I waterboarded someone with tequila.
And I can say one thing, I look pretty good in high wasted pants. I don't know if that helps. But I do. God I'm high.
On a better note: I'm on pace for 730 female produced orgasms in 2013.
I LIKE NICE BOXERS OKAY!? COMBINED WITH A GLORIOUS DICK JUST MAKES THIS EVEN BETTER. WE MOVE IN TOGETHER AND THAT PIC'S GETTIN FUCKING FRAMED.
Just watched a middle age white woman scream WHY DON'T YOU GO FUCK YOURSELF, HELEN?! Helen seemed absolutely scandalized.
He hit me up on Grindr and called me "bro." I just have to assume that the sex is going to be bad.
I threw up all of my purple drank and thats really important
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