forecast for tonight- shitshow with a chance of tbell
my version of bright and sunny.
It was awkward until we both realized our obsessions with harry potter and sangrias were the same. Now were in love.
You need tk get a life and stop texting me about fictional characters. I don't give a shit.
so when am I gonna get some from you?
when you dick grows 3 inches
birthday sex, birthday sex, birthday sex
I'm on my period, period, period
He just turned 21, it's very obvious the end of their relationship is near. Now we play the waiting game.
It feels like I'm breathing out my heart and it spreads through my limbs to my fingertips.
So I've decided to grow a vagina forest. Because I'm single and it's like a zen garden. Brings a new meaning to long hair don't care.
I don't think ill be here long the chick I came to see is blowing rails with a drag queen
yeah but think of how much more hungover we'd be if we didn't steal those cookies
How do I feel about a girl who has a g string tattooed on
His cat must have been laying on his dick, because now my face is covered in hives
Just gave my thesis presentation, pretty sure I made out with the admissions woman last night.
There is an alarming amount of food in my bra.
I'm currently on an epic search all over the city for a drug store that isn't sold out of Plan B. I celebrated your birthday from afar.
So I'm hiding in my bathroom smoking bowls because my landlords kids came over to visit my dog... My life has reached a new low
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