I had to remind him that there is no "age exchange rate" between the u.s. and spain, and that 16 will always equal 16
then she said "on the count of three I think we should apologize to eachother"
In other news I saw a pack of make believe zombies walking down green st.
gotta love wednesdays
Got a thumbs up from a trucker for doing lines on the interstate. God bless america.
The drugstore has summer clearance. I bought you a little mermaid bucket. Now your hangovers will feel more like childhood adventures.
I vaguely remember trying to exfoliate my face with your leg hair. Sorry about that.
I wish you would stop telling everyone that your cock turned me into a Bears fan.
If you end up at a gay bar on a tuesday night in steelers pjs, does that mean youve hit rock bottom?
Dude. Get me out of here. I'm surrounded by glitter-faced 40 year olds in halter tops. The desperation here is so thick you can taste it.
Then I'll go home and you two can do whatever two same sex heterosexual soul mates do
That pizza at 1 am literally tasted like I was eating an angel
Taco Bell is giving high school kids free tacos STEAL YOUR BROTHER'S WALLET I'LL BRING THE WEED.
Jesus Christ. Even your cock has to be an overachiever. :-(
WHAT KIND OF DEALER ONLY WORKS FRI-SUN???
Ours, apparently.
They made Game of Thrones Oreos. Kill me.
Randomize
