what's the vibe there?
extraordinary amounts of gine
You stuck the head of a rubber chicken you found in her house up your ass and then started running around her living room. Naked.
she likes to give head while listening to britney spears, getting blown by a girl with headphones on is a nice level of separation
I hate that the only Italian aspect of me is I get red and sweaty when I drink
you passed out on the bathroom floor with the door locked. we had to break in and no one was sober enough to move you so they just threw a towel on you and stepped over you
I knew it was time to stop when you guys were playing a drinking game called "every three steps take a drink"
Do you know what your brother wants for his birthday?
Yeah he said he wants a decent blowjob for a change.
.......
I'm just looking out for you.
Discovered a freckle on my clitoris. What have you done today?
Is "when in doubt date the guy with the bigger dick" a good philosophy?
Just introduced myself to a group of people and one dude said "You're Marc!? I've heard many a legend of you." I raised bottle of champagne, said cheers, and drank with them.
I just need you to stay far enough away that I can't smell your cologne. I completely forget that I fucking hate you as soon as I smell it.
Sorry about the Christmas balls dude. At the time I thought they were festive as fk but I see now I've just spent too much time on the internet
Drunk me really needs to stop 1. telling every attractive dude in a relationship that monogamy isn't real 2. Proposing threesomes with them and their girlfriends
I want to create a human. Discussion later.
This lady is talking to me and all I can think about is getting face fucked and doing cocaine. Not neccesarily together and not neccesarily in that order
Randomize
