It really wasn't that bad. Well, it was pretty bad, but only in 3 second bursts.
He was so drunk that he tried to backflip off a baby chair.. How do you think that ended?
the blizzard started in kansas. im debating driving to a bar now so i can get snowed in there for the game
Also managed to rip my pants and set myself on fire. And oddly enough I'm still not ready to ask for 2010 back.
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You are not about to raise that baby deer, you can BARELY raise yourself... Return it to it's mom now.
I love that your nipples always taste like clean laundry.
Btw: some husbands are not impressed by me trying to snap photos of their wives camel toe.
Most senic walk of shame ever. This is why you go to school in Hawaii.
Nothing like hearing "I found your pinky nail" before you even noticed it was missing.
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I almost spit out my drink. But only almost, because it was vodka. And you don't spit out vodka.
We couldn't find the paddle I had gotten so he just spanked with my tennis raquet
If it's any consolation, I made really strong brownies yesterday and had 3 and then I saw demons
As he was cumming he yelled "Yahtzee" then said im free to go. Thats my one night stand
You're too drunk for my bullshit, and i'm too sober to put up with yours. I have no idea how you expect to find middle ground here.
Fun fact: nipples work on touch screens. Tell your friends :)
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