She told me I was lying in front of her toilet for an hour saying "lasers."
they esentially rejected my mermaid threesome offer:(
All I remember is doing a naked tuck and roll of your bed.
Doubtful. That seems irresponsible. The 4th will kill you if you stopped drinking until then. Let's think logically.
I just watched dragonflies fucking. You can't match that level of geek.
Ps I'm glad our relationship hasn't progressed into having to get married so we legally can't testify against each other
She just mixed her Emergen-C with champagne... Vegas here we come!
It's that whole "half Japanese, half asshole" thing. My brother and I have found that people really go for that
It was only in the sobering silence of the wilderness on the mountain, after I was too tired to talk anymore and I also didn't want to tell Julian that we were lost, that I realized how super tripped out I had been the entire time...
Leave it to me to sleep w a guy who gets poison ivy on his dick
I asked to see his balls for medical purposes.
I was looking for a pen and I stumbled upon my mom's vibrator. On a related note, yes I will be going out tonight.
I'm like a sensual ninja. You turn your head for a second and.... BOOM I'm naked. It's like a naughty magic trick.
Is it disrespectful or patriotic to pole dance on an american flag pole?
Please don't give away my fajitas
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