They keep asking what you are doing. I told them to quit calling her "what."
I was able to overlook the Affliction tee until he took it off and there was another tattooed on his body.
Was it at least attractive minus the Gargoyles or skulls... or whatever affliction is putting out these days?
Even a greek god couldn't pull it off. Told him I like Ed Hardy Better. Death Before Dishonor, baby. I'm sure it was a painful blow. hopefully he understands sarcasm.
Every perfect package comes with a warning label.
I'm calling into work with a wicked case of sledge hammer crotch. She has to understand
it's kinda bad that we're already planning travel arrangements to his funeral
For the love of God you used a 40 foot extension cord to bungee jump out the off the 2 nd floor
Gonna bang his former student. Clearly I am winning this breakup.
i just found out the cashier has a picture of my junk in her phone.
Quick question. What's the protocol on going back to a bar after going home with one of their bartenders?
Go back and try to find another to go home with.
She just came home holding a fire hydrant. Yes a fire hydrant.
Why did you send me 12 pictures in a row of your expressionless face at 2:30 am?
You kept saying "this bitch", mumbled incoherently for like 5 minutes, took a shot, and kept going.
Also I just had a pointless meeting and the only thing I accomplished were my kegals
God I need to hump something, right now.
All I heard was "sit on my face" "okay" and muffled screaming. I'm still disappointed.
Randomize
