Does adding vodka to a protein shake defeat the purpose?
we've already established he's totally wasted. but now he's just sitting at his computer, doing i don't know what, and he keeps saying "dammmn girl" in a really low whisper
There's a pair of socks on the bar. No-one's questioned this.
im almost positive that in mid thrust she told me she was pro choice
FACT: the parking lot attendant was yelling "NO SEX HERE! NO SEX" at yall.
I've only been home four days and my parents' cleaning lady already wrote down the number to AA and told me she's praying for me.
he fell down during beer pong and the chick told him to rub the sand out of his pussy and suck it up. i am in love
He is just lying there. People are throwing money onto his chest as they walk by...
U know that drunk state, where at 930 the next morning your sitting in a bath in ur bathing suit trying to sober up...yeah. That's where i am..
Just realized I'm going to have to make you sign a non-disclosure agreement before my wedding.
im pretty sure the interns at this hospital have gotten hotter
He has silky zebra print sheets, which you would think he put on just for me, but the bed was unmade. Did I just sleep with a closet case??
So... How much of our rent is drug money?
I feel like my liver should be on crutches right now
Soooo, hypothetically, how long would roommates have to sleep together before its considered dating...
Randomize
