I fell asleep next to my cousin and woke up with my hand in her pants because i though it was lisa
Different chick, same blowjob, same parking lot.
Dude. Creed is coming in september.
We're no longer friends.
Went to the career fair today..I handed out many resumes to find out later that they say I have a bachelor o farts degree...Top that.
You've ruined blow jobs for me. You were the motzart of sucking dick, where every other girl is like awkward elevator music
Be honest with Daniel. He was a good rebound to you for nine months and he made it so you could be with the one you really love and care for now. Just tell him thanks and best of luck.
Youre on making sure I dont black out around fat chicks duty
He went into the alley to piss and came back a minute later with a case of Bud Select. I'm speechless.
bleeding from the face, sitting in a shopping cart and holding a wad of ripped caution tape. what else would i be doing?
Seriously wondering if smoking a bowl for lunch was a bad idea.
OR THE BEST. STAY TUNED.
I made her orgasm until she cried. Four years of only having sex with dudes and I've still got it.
I just walked in on my sixteen year old sister soaking her tampon in vodka. I go to Berkeley. And they think she's the good daughter.
If our sexual relationship was relative to the Harry Potter series, I would have claimed the Wizard's Cup at least ten times.
Ever since we've gotten back together, it's like the ghosts of booty call's past have been hitting me up. Lol.
Starting to realize that fucking everyone I come across isn't the most... "adult"... coping method.
Randomize
