Literal conversation "you are ________ ____. you facebook friended me"
If a girl is wearing Ed Hardy from head to toe, does that make her a douchebagette?
All I remember is yelling at him to admit he liked Bon Jovi, then accusing him of giving love a bad name.
She went to the bathroom before i broke up with her so i changed all 2500 of her songs on her computer to "I'm a cheating whore"
I puked for half an hour, but I went and danced afterwards, and that made me feel better.
You are so irish.
Now we are really drunk and her 17 yr old cousin is shitfaced. He may or may not have proposed a toast to octopuses and double fisting. And we just drank to Mexico.
Glad we went casual last night, made my 1pm walk of shame through Walmart a little less obvious
it was a frathouse cornucopia of foul mixed drinks and "sangria", which im convinced was blood and pcp
She saves ONE person's life while blacked out and now she's positive anything can be done "while fucking hammered"
You're like the Mr. T of my A-team, only less gold jewelry and more pitying of fools.
That's the nicest thing anyone has said to me all day.
Turns out the old man beside me in the waiting room was dead, but other then that it was a good day.
can we for just one second remember that I played with a homeless man's rat at st marks?
Is it disrespectful or patriotic to pole dance on an american flag pole?
I think I may have just hit a new slutty low! ..... Just purchased the Costco pack of condoms... $9.99/48 pack = amazing deal! The judgement when I bust out the value pack = priceless!!!
He’s disease free and drives a Porsche. What else does a girl need?
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