Why would I want to inherit a sex machine used by my grandma?
im using old socks as coasters. im going to make a great housewife.
Not gonna happen. She just told me she puts glitter over the mole on her nose to make it look like a piercing.
Its piss that you smell... I borrowed that shirt last week. Sooo, wanna grab some laundry soap on your way home? And good luck on your date.
I envy the lives of milf's kids, the little kid grabs her tits and she just laughs and says not now
I am soup sandwich. I have been at dAnce party
Ended the weekend putting away 30 nuggets. Training for 100.
he went to have surgery in the morning and apparently they found lip gloss on his dick
oh my god. the driver of our party bus just said "no drugs unless you're sharin," my confidence in him is not high at the moment
KNEE DEEP IN HOES. SEND HELP.
From now on I forbid you to refer to it as a "bed". From now on you must only use the phrase "sex wagon".
You showed your tits for hundreds of beads but magically became shy when there was food on the line
I just forgot I was standing up.
OMFG. JUST WALKED IN ON A DUDE JERKING IT IN THE MCDONALDS BATHROOM
Stall or urinal?
My professor just asked for my number. Not fucking her till after finals though I learned my lesson last time.
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