I just found out the guys at work had a bet as to who could sleep with me before i move away.
Who won?
All of them.
I'm so glad you managed to take a picture of your foreskin before you broke my camera.
Who were the five players on the alien team from space jam?
ya and he came three minutes into it because he didnt have sex all summer
oh that makes more sense i knew you arent that good
and if it starts getting weird im just going to tell him i used to be a man
I woke up around 30 bottles of beer, with a piece of aluminum foil in my hand, that had "you Win" Wrote in sharpie..
When your really high you cant order into a clowns mouth
I thinking of taking all of the pics of his dick that he's sent me and making a calendar.
All is not lost. The bondage chair came with repair seals and glue. It's like the knewwwwwww this would happen.
i wish his balls had a scratch and sniff sticker elsewhere so i would know before i even went down there
The sex was so good I went temporarily numb. Slightly embarrassing when she pointed out I was kissing my own arm.
Nothing like grinding all night with a hot ethnic guy dressed as a clown to help conquer your phobia. Halloween is fucked up.
So here's my pathetic thought of the day: what does it smell like to be sober?
How did they ever let a trainwreck like myself run a bar?!
Heading there now. Already have a boner.
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