I wonder how skeet ulrich feels about the skeet skeet phrase and and what it denotes.
He called me "the Joe Montana of blowies." Not sure if that is an accomplishment or an insult, but going off of the amount of condensation on the windows of my car, I'm gonna just do a little touchdown dance and pass out.
you would not believe what I got pierced last night...
son, I feel like that is a phrase a father never wants to hear.
I wanna tell red shirt guy I'm pregnant and use the abortion money for Coachella.
He is going to sleep with me. That's all there is to it. I'm 4 for 4 right now. I'm not making it 4 for 5.
I held his ankles while he hung off the top bunk attempting to get my pillow that fell off.
She's trying to put on her dog muzzle on her self
I mean there is a rehab there so its gotta be a good time
Pretty sure I was high. I thought there was music coming out of my makeup bag.
My bathing suit kept falling whenever I went under a wave and this kid caught on and kept checking them out so I told him nothing comes free $5 a boob
NATIONAL GIVE A BOSTON COP A BLOW JOB BITCH ROAD TRIP NOW
You also thought the cure to hiccups was drowning yourself (and you were right)
apparently while i was high i thought that putting a dinosaur temporary tattoo on my inner thigh would keep me from taking my pants off and having sex with him...
...it didn't...
You took your pants and underwear off as soon as we got to Melissa's and just walked around the entire time like it was completely normal. We even ate pizza together with your vagina exposed. You're my hero.
Oral sex and brunch. The perfect sunday morning.
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