drunk me is my new role model. he's fearless. like not even afraid of tornadoes.
You wrote me a letter and I cannot make out anything you wrote except the last sentence which says "tell the wolf ill meet him at sunset and that I'm sorrry"
I have now slept with people from more countries than Ive actually visited. Can we make this a game somehow? Like foreign fuck buddy bingo?
i wanna pet his head its so fluffy. were gonna open a petting zoo
got extra credit for showing up to class before a holiday. it hit me 5 minutes later that she meant easter....
She fell out the car soaking wet and screaming "im wearing a fedora!" then tryed to seduce him on the front lawn in front of his middle aged neighbor
I've awoken at 3am again, in a night terror, just thinking about how big his dick was.
the problem with having sex for lunch when its 98 degrees outside is that I can't tell if its sweat or semen running down my leg as I walk back in the office
Make this decision based on your love for dick - NOT based on the fact that its probably one of the worst things you've ever thought of doing
Your French couch surfers have just started playing flip cup with old crow. Basically you need to come back here
I blew him while watching the aristocats. There were singing cats in the background. I think he he hummed along at one point.
She's dressed as a slutty goth schoolgirl. Those are my three favorite things. God himself could not give me whiskey dick.
Im part way to drunk.
Well I've always wanted to get head while playing WoW...
K I'll do it, but mine is going to be WAY weirder. Your not allergic to shellfish, right?
i knew it was a party when i saw you sitting on the couch naked with the keg in your lap, still drinking and passing out cups
Randomize
