We drank from noon till 5 am, there was adderall and nice jews involved it was just crazy
two pink lines on a pregnancy test is bad, isn't it?
only if you didn't want to fuck up your life.
just did awkward shuffle by the bagels in the dining hall at 7:30 AM with a kid i've hooked up with. goodbye freshman year.
Pretty sure that drunken football on the back porch with 6 guys with a champagne bottle was a bad idea....
They're taking me to ER. Mistasnkingly. Come get me.
She bellyflopped onto the poolside bar, broke one wine bottle, and stole another...the resort staff just frowned and cleaned up her mess.
The poor thing was so drunk they wheeled his motorcycle into the bar. I just dropped him off to pick it up. The best walk of shame ever.
Sexual tension squid is drowning in the sexual tension
As we were about to go at it, his roommates barged in singing jumper by third eye blind. Weirdest almost one night stand ever.
It's always a good night until the penis tattoo makes an appearance
who is the naked dude on the coffee table
thats jeff, jeff is nice so don't be rude
We are the best cocktail. We look appealing, taste amazing, and ruin lives.
I fear our relationship is coming to an end. Last night I felt the need to bloody apologise for waking him up with a blow job.
Random question, what's John-that-we-had-a-threesome-with's phone number? Don't necessarily need the full number, maybe just area code? Think I drunkenly ran into him last night and now I have texts from a John.
He's nice and all but I think I rather masturbate my way to happiness instead.
Randomize
