In a bar in glasgow talking to a 12 year old about life. Welcome to Kentucky.
I'm done trying to be a vegetarian. My vagina smells like hummus.
lets have sex before this no shave november shit gets outta hand.
I was looking at some smoking pipes on amazon the other day and realized that work people could look at my history and do a drug test. So I immediately started looking at Sherlock Holmes hats.
speaking of graduation plans, i'm blacked out eating sausage
Where is my rescue team. I keep hiding shit. And I'm trying to give out shots of olive oil
Bro I am trying to have one night stands nothing more, unless she is baking waffles I can eat out of her butthole I am not interested
I would not be watching the debate if there wasn't drinking involved. Let's be honest.
The least you could do is send me some gibberish so I know you're alive.
Fuhga
Thank you.
Safe to say I'm terrified but totally AMPED
But college guys get to crossfade so there's that
No idea what that is
Like getting bent? When you drink and smoke together...
I'm 30 stop using your cool kids words
Pretty sure the guy at the Halloween party dressed as an ice cream man is working his way through the building without a care for gender or age. He high-fives me on his way out each morning.
Oh I fucked him, definitely. We played Strip Halo.
He played with my nipples while singing "How great thou art"
My house exploded and with it all my pot went up in smoke.
Randomize
