Nights of college: 1. Virgins: 1. Yes.
Skipped a towel and decided to spit the cum into his face. I now owe him new contacts.
the lady in the checkout infront of me had a case of beer, two 40 oz, and activia...really??i dont' think irregularity is her problem
Watching water boil has never been so amazing. I love wake-and-bakes.
All i remember is people cheering me on to drink faster than the dog, out of the dog's bowl. I just couldn't stop.
At least I will not still be rolling when I pick up this animal. Thats a good development in five years
I cNt phones. tingles in my fingles. jingles
Would I chase a raccoon with a flaming stick sober?
It has been so long since I got any action that I have decided to change my vagina's name from "the chamber of judgement" to "the cave of forgotten dreams".
Just pee around me
They have a house rule that you get a composite for every 5 guys you sleep with. Where should I hang my new one?
I think if you have sex on the couch it will psychologically damage it.
Also the girl beside me smells like she's been in a deep fryer.
Well. I had to explain to my niece that the word cunt is not an abbreviation for country. I'm the best aunt in the world.
It's a draw. You need to settle it in Smash, Soul Calibur, and/or rock-paper-scissors, the last of which Steve claims is bullshit.
Randomize
