do you believe in love at first sight?
awwwwww =)
yea.. so can i have your sisters number? thanks!
it was almost as awkward as hearing my parents on friday nights in 2 in the morning starting, and than hearing at 2:01 my dad getting up and my mom going "i should have married a man"
I hate myself for saying your mom and I have the same friday nights.
don't worry... so do I
he told me it was because of the roids, but i couldn't tell if he meant ster or hem.
Hopefully the semester will be over before she has a breakout. Then I can just avoid the situation entirely
From now on, just let me go home. I'm tired of hooking up with your roommates... Including you.
it only took me 1 hour to write 8 pages. i'm never doing school work without adderall ever again.
you passed out on the bathroom floor with the door locked. we had to break in and no one was sober enough to move you so they just threw a towel on you and stepped over you
Yeah like at least with a penis what you see is what you get with a vagina there can always be a surprise inside
Maybe it's cuz you slapped him with a pancake last night
I just stole a conducting baton from the chicago symphony orchestra... i have to stop drinking on weeknights
him and the cab driver we buy e from got into a fist fight, about which show is better, futurama or family guy.
No seriously you guys are gonna get arrested
Do me a favor I want you to reach down the front of your pants and underwear and just feel around for a while... if you happen to find your balls then join us
Is it too soon for me to wonder what sex with him would be like?
Man I sound like a slutty Mormon
Fucking a younger guy is now a game of odds. The chance that he gives me corona virus is outweighed by the evening of orgasms I know he’ll give me.
Randomize
