i think the world will end when pigs can fly. think about it, everyone says blah blah when pigs fly. so shit would be going down if they ever can.
oh fuck your right
he just quoted gucci mane to try and get me to give him head.
the only human I can compare her to is rosie o'donnell.
so apparently the car got towed with me passed out in the back seat.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Im in search of the perfect penis, it would be unethical for me not to test run them.
I feel like we should actually go to church one of these days to thank god for saving us from herpes and babies.
Omg do you remember last night you kept pointing to your vag asking who wants to play this like a fiddle hahaha
Lets play hurricane shelter. And the shelter is my bed, and we forgot our clothes.
My team for a project is gonna have weekly meetings at a bar. yessss. they will do all the work while i thor hammer down beers.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm sorry but if you can't drink a bottle of wine without a glass, I do not think we can be friends.
Can someone please explain where the fish in the mason jar came from when we were at a bar all night?
You told the bartender if he gave you one of the fish you'd go away
Is it socially acceptable to break up with someone over snapchat?
So, I'm either with my future life partner or my future life taker. And his brother. lol. I'll let you know when I get home alive.
stop texting me about your public sex.
says she who narrated getting eaten out in a movie theatre over text to me
What can I say, like your penis. The fact that I like the person attached to it helps too
Randomize