Swine flu. Run for my life!
New drinking game: drink every time the guy whose room we are in is creepy
enjoy the hospital
The last thing I remember is yelling "ill handle this" while wearing a lion suit and holding a jug of vodka when the RAs came
College students should never be allowed to have snow days. Never.
Ive made peace with the fact that i will accomplish nothing except liver damage today
He licked the chalk off his shirt, then spat the Mountain Dew from his mouth onto the shirt and sucked on it. And thats him sober.
Why would I take you home? That would eliminate the chances of you making bad decisions I could ridicule you about later.
It makes no sense at first, you go with it, it's fun and entertaining and then a disaster
6 pack came off in the shower. Sharpie is not forever.
found one of my socks in the dishwsaher... xanax
I was floored. Like way less concerned with him using drugs than I am with him not believing in evolution.
U sent me lyrics to wind beneath my wings
My liver misses your liver
I vaguely remember ordering a water at some point last night. It's good to know drunk me can still be responsible.
Making friends with the guy who had alcohol-infused whipped cream was the best decision I made all night.
You just kept yelling GET YOUR SKATES ON, BITCHES. WE'RE GOING STREAKING.
Randomize
