Rocking a Headband at the strip club, because of Rock of Love this shit is like their kryptonite, I smell like stripper butter and back child support.
FYI: if you have sex in your room with the light on, we can totally see your shadows from the parking lot
Your boyfriend has good rhythm though.
Last night we were drunk and talking about rude things, I mentioned felching and had to explain it to everyone. Everyone was disgusted and asked how I knew about such filth and I told them you told me. Don't get mad. Also a quck heads up, you might get gifts of straws at work,
and she's shaped like a lego person so that's not happening
just watched an entire episode so you think you can dance for head. so wasn't worth it
Nope it's a specific set of cards not like a normal ace, queen king thing....kinda like UNO, but instead of yelling UNO you get shitfaced
Tell me why I'm at Target and this entire Spanish family is crowding around the condoms questioning which ones they should get
You should have hard cock pics on hand to send in the situation that you can't stop driving, pull out your cock, browse the countless pics I've sent you of my tits, get him hard and text a pic through. I mean, it's simple sexting ettiquette.
I don't know what it was about last night, but every bar that i went to there was at least one girl there that i had done something with. I'm sure the girl that i went with knew because they all grabbed my penis and told me to call them.
I was grinding on people that were grinding. Nonconsensual.
I could be busy drinking my face off and getting red white and bruised per usual
you just cant say you love him and then say you want to fuck your boss
We broke the bed while I was handcuffed to the headboard and let's just say that was a hard one to explain to the RA
I just got a robo call from the Addiction Help Line. Not sure how to take that.
I WAS SURROUNDED BY HAIRY BALLS ALL ALONE.
Randomize