Stop staring at my boobs, I can't concentrate
Well how do you think I feel
fair enough
You showed the cops outside of the bar your boobs and then decided to go apologize to them. They admitted that the reason they hung out there was because of girls like you.
2 showers later and I'm still finding cum on random body parts of mine
I don't know how many crown and cokes he went through but I know it was more that I have fingers. We are never leaving Texas.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The night started going down hill when she shot the cashier in the face with the confetti gun we bought at 711.
We're trying to decide between cracker barrel an the ER
Be ready for a dog pile. On your head. With my ass.
Is eating fries while lying on the floor bad for you?
If I choke and die at least I will have been doing something I love
grandma made pot brownies .. oh god bless us everyone
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It was bitter sweet because I woke him up with sex but then I peed in his bed with him in it
Uh do you have my pants because I have yours
Why did I wake up in bed with the ironing board and a Mariah Carey mask? Vodka hates me
Even blacked out me knows not to sleep with socks on
If it makes you feel any better, I can't find the goldfish I dropped like five minutes ago.
I know he’s married, but he’s still a guy with balls and a dick. He noticed my cleavage and stared at my ass. He’ll call.
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