im watching shaqs comedy special. this is how i know im not sober.
I understand. Hypothetically what should one do after throwing up in the shower?
he just made me do "this little piggy" to his toes.
I got a handjob to the OC theme song. It was like going back in time 7 years.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
not good my parents heard a big thud and found me passed out in the bathrrom abt an hr ago. hit my head arm and side. dont remember. real talk.
Or maybe my penis is just the key to their locked boxes of crazy, and I unleash their wrath upon all of mankind just so I can get my nut off
It was a perpetual wrestle for who got to be on bottom. Laziest hookup ever.
I respect your roll as DD and there're am required to respect your vehicle
I'll come hang out with you guys later, but right now my parents aren't home and I have to take full advantage of being able to watch porn on full blast.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She invited me to Bikini Yoga with her friends. Sounds promising.
It was all fun and games until he noticed the hickey that he hadn't given me...
Packing for college has become a game of where did I hide my sex toys.
if becoming an adult is chugging a bottle of wine in your bed and crying about your stresses while your dog watches you, sign me up
According to my snapchat story, I tore a fake wig off a security guard and ran away with it.
My butt remains clenched, sir.
Randomize