is swine flu sexually transmttd?
Ha no, why?
sriously ive never had a hangovr this bad
Question. If Kwik Trip and Kum and Go were to merge, what would they call it? Kwik Kum or Kum Kwik?
your ex dropped by. you can call me dwight howard, cuz im the king of rebounds
please keep texting me so i can pretend someone likes me
I don't remember what your face looks like..
I don't remember your face either, just your dick.
oh god...if the people that live above me killed themselves again then im gonna assume im the worst neighbor ever
Listen, you can whine about not having a "red" wine glass, or you can suck it up and chug it from the vase like the rest of us. The choice is yours.
you peed off the balcony at your sisters and asked someone below to catch it with a cup
Next time I feel awkward in a situation I'm going to just yell "free bird!!!!" Like some redneck at lynyrd skynyrd show
It's a good thing my liver is flexible because a lesser man would be dead
They say find what you're good at... Evidently that's showing up late for everything, drinking, and eating cheese for me.
I just wanted to personally thank you for throwing clementine slivers at me across the room while we made out
Is this because I accidentally peed on you?
Fortunatly we found him, he was on my roof. Unfortunatly, we can't say the same for his pants. Still looking. BRB.
On a scale of 1-10 I’m at biblical violence
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