If im going to fail a midterm I might as well be drunk while I do it
FUUUUUCK she froze all my quaters inside the ice cubes again
in case you blackout.. this is confirmation that yes, you were sitting spread eagle on the kitchen floor chugging pickle juice out of the jar.
at least i was responsible enough to take off my shoe and throw up in it
French fry pizza
Are you brilliant or just really high?
Can't it be both?
I'm not considering your visit a success until we've fucked every cock in the ethnic rainbow...between the four of us we should have it done by x-mas
Is there really anything more beautiful than opening a fresh box of wine on a Friday afternoon?
I made out with a guy because he was sitting on my coat...
Walk back down Church toward Mass Ave. Take a right and head for the guy in a kilt on top of the really tall unicycle. C u soon!
I SMOKED SO MUCH I SKIPPED A DAY.
I woke up with his condom in my mouth. I actually use them now you should be proud of me.
jesus, I think that canada gold metal game has completely changed all rules of acceptable drinking habits, I was fucked untill noon and I just got invited to go party when I get off work...at 600am...and NO ONE understood why i was hesitant
A penis isn't a time share. I want to own not rent.
I just smoked part of an Oreo cuz I thought it was some hash you left
So if i am talking to a guy and he sends me a pic and he is wearing Spiderman button down dress shirt.... Is it ok if i dont want to talk to him anymore?
Randomize