my night went downhill once I lost my bikershorts. EAWSSSSYY ACCESS
dude. i was so high. i watched shrek in russian.
3 different guys in my psych class know me as 3 different names and said hi to me with all 3 different names-Andrea, Grace, and Bella
I've never been more proud of you
Most fantastic sex ever until her Doberman took an interest in what we were doing. There was nothing more terrifying then feeling warm dog breath on my ballsack.
Well ya in hindsight obviously offering the cop a jello shot was a bad idea
Yes. It's so easy to pack to leave when you've thrown away half your clothing cause it smells like vomit.
Homecoming wouldn't be the same without all the drunk old people puking on the street.
I think I may have some undocumented and undiscovered std that causes girls to go bat shit crazy. How you got it is beyond me
So our trip to Disney World ended in the three of us stripping at a gay club in orlando.
I'm just mad because I can't play gta5 all day tomorrow cuz I'll be in court testifying against a craigslist prostitute...
I still don't know his name but his ass is spectacular. Like he should never wear pants.
She told me the only rule was that I couldn't cum on her Batman blanket.
Just had an orgasim to the Star Spangled Banner so.. it was all worth it.
But actually he solved 40% of my life problems just in one dicking
Sorry for peeing on your books last night. I wouldn't leave them next to the window anymore.
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