Sooo i definitely have a major burn on my chin from kenny's ...stubble from making out for hours while coked up. Pure class.
I'm drinking in the hospital parking lot.
I was excited because I thought I didn't have to tell you about the crabs, but surprise! You got em!
you kept yelling at her to "show me your genitals" until the bouncers told us to leave...at which point you showed them YOUR genitals...
please don't ever take me to a strip club again...
I have to overdose on valtrex I had a rough weekend.
It's getting increasingly easier to use his emotional instability to my advantage. That's about all he has going for him right now.
he was extremely fucked up- he thought my sports bra was his boxers. even when his leg wouldnt fit. at least whiskey dick wasnt a problem
She's drunk as hell locked up I. The bathroom with my shoes where do I go from here
Am I allowed to be in denial about being gay again? Or is that one of those things you can't do?
You are under a naked attack watch for the whole weekend. Shelter in place.
Considering who their parents are, maybe you should use vodka for the baptism.
His parents came home, and now I'm hiding in a closet; awaiting death at dawn.
You are always hiding in a closet though??
That cat I follow on Facebook beat cancer so we're drinking tonight in celebration
Is it sad to eat a candy bra by yourself?
He said I have the “Denzel Washington” of vaginas.
Randomize
