At what point did we cease to have vaginas?
Sometime in the sweat pants phase freshman year.
You tried to get the stranger on the sea bus to give you a bite of his chicken sub by repeating over and over "im in a girl band"
I totally just stopped for a booty call on the way to my parents for easter....good friday is an understatement
So I got hit in the face with a frying pan. So def wont be at work for first break if I'm there at all
Seriously, I am going to crawl in a hole, sew my vagina shut, and spit acid on any man that comes near me.
Idk I somehow continue to get laid by pulling my dick out and reciting the 3 world country orphan kid commercials
I want to be stormed in. I want to be stuck there. I want to climb a pyramid of strippers to safety
First sunburned tits of the season. And it's only April... I feel like it's going to be a good summer.
I thought I would be a proper lady and put my spare panties in a ziplock
The comfort of this onesie is keeping me single
And you seriously thought you could just walk in naked with a bow tied around your penis?
It seemed like a good idea at the time...
and then the sword just ended up between my legs
So the vodka/tequila mix went down fine but the burp made me cry
PANTIES FOUND
If there's someone that knows accidental pantlessness, it's Mike.
Randomize