They should make a Rosetta Stone that allows men to understand what the fuck women are actually trying to say.
We watched a biography of Frida Kahlo in class today. It was depressing. A chick with a UNIBROW just put my sex life to shame.
Please tell me you're throwing the cats into this foot of snow.
Def walking back to my apt with a blender, an empty vodka bottle, and a half eAtn drumstick cone.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
There are work activities and non work activities and dunking my head in a bucket of ice water pulling it out and shotguning a beer is certainly not a work activity
how many past hook-ups can i invite to go bar hopping with me for my b-day before it becomes a bad idea?
Who is this?
You offered to lift up your dress at the bar so I could see your lower back tattoo
Um, I think that was a general offer to everyone. So...who IS this?
Lots of alcohol. 3rd graders fuck me now.
Auto correct or actual 3rd graders?
while she was riding me, she looked at me and said "this is why mom told me learning how to ride a horse would be important for my future"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
PUT YOUR FRESHLY SHAVED MEXICAN POON ON THAT BEARD. NOW.
It was big, black, and had a smiley face tattooed on it. It was the perfect penis.
I just sent a snapchat of my boobs for Adderall. It's finals season.
Tomorrow we start training our livers for St.Patrick's day. May God be with us.
I didn't want dick. I wanted spaghetti.
he sent me a picture of him holding out his pinky so we could pinky promise. i have to fuck him now
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