brb k???!! plz don't leave i want 2 tlk bout r rltnshp
We can make salsa ya know, maybe even some hot sauce. That doesn't mean we're married.
It's noon and i am somehow drinking by myself in a jazz tent in broad daylight.
Well, according to foursquare I checked in "@under the bushes" at 3:27am. This could explain some things.
i was so worried that when his hands were down my pants he was going to find the weed i stole from him
If i need to get strippers involved i will.
it was a frathouse cornucopia of foul mixed drinks and "sangria", which im convinced was blood and pcp
Myy bathroom floor makes me think I'm on Mars. Also. Did you realize that yesterday we perfected thee mind high-five??
Do you know what the cost code is for strip clubs? I'm filling out my company expense report right now
Impressive. I've never gotten straight denied and then chased the guy naked out of my own apt. I'll remember that next time.
I think his dick was bigger than his dog
I've only fucked to 2 Fleetwood Mac songs, that must be why my life feels so empty.
His dick is curly. It's adorable.
And I broke things off with Justin last night. Except I texted him while he was asleep and then I was like well, that's probably not what he wants to wake up to, so I sent him a picture of the coconut I microwaved and caught on fire when I was really high one time.
He wanted me to do the rubix cube. He thought it was hot.
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