dude sorry but u no that when a guys 'likes' ur pic on facebook it only means he was just jacking off to it.
I've had enough of this chick, she wanted to cuddle after giving me a handjob. I feel like I'm in junior high
He deserves to hear about your Vagina Shrooms
Do you remember Kelly my alter personality? She talked like a man and would sing amazing grace?
I'm just sad for you. It sucks that the 17 douchebag asshole guys you're fucking can't morph into one nice, normal, non-alcoholic guy that has a drivers license and no criminal history.
He took the bartender's challenge and took a Jello shot with a tarantula frozen inside.
She acts like a 3 year old but with fantastic tits. This girl is the reason women are objectified
She was just a sweet cute intern for us until I saw her naked in my bed the day after the Christmas party
God I need to stop before there's a picture of my dick on my mom's phone.
Is it acceptable to have my intern get me pedialite and plan b?
It's a learning experience. She can add to her resume that she cured her bosses hangover and poor decisions
Yeah. Moral of the story: Don't mace yourself. It sucks dick.
He tried to get me to go back to his place on the condition that he has 6 cats. I was very tempted but I said no. Hoping to go see the cats tomorrow
I don't think he liked your vagina hand signal
we didn't even throw knives this time! it was just the carrot peeler
She was riding me and giving me score updates to the basketball game at the same time..... Shes a keeper
Randomize
