Regardless of the degree, it's probably not good to relate so closely to the Steve-O documentary.
all you did was keep googling "what time is it" over and over and over
Yeah. Fortunately, the road to Hell is paved with naked 21 year old girls.
Which beats the fuck out of good intentions.
Would it be cruel if i sold xanax instead of adderall to freshman unfamiliar to the drug-taking profession?
But i don't feel like talking to him right now. I woke up an hour ago to a picture of his penis and I AM NOT A MORNING PERSON.
Even the paramedic said "what a way to kill a party"
it was really awkward meeting your mom for the first time while i was still wearing the condom we were using.
I'm drinking nothing but vodka and coffee for the next 48 hours. For science.
I want everyone to love me, and THEN I will choose who gets to eat me out all the time.
He managed to crash an entire train of shopping carts into a wall. I think he noticed my implants.
It's times when I'm naked but also want to be platonically social that I miss you the most.
I'm sitting next to the guy that peed in our drying machine
Wanna see if we can get cut off at bdubs again? The same hipster manager that is younger than us is working again
Just woke up in a Price Chopper bathroom stall with a half eaten cake on the floor. Had to get a ride from the waitress I made out with. What happened to "Don't let me drink Tequila?"
I lied.
He fucked me so hard my contacts fell out! Didnt know that was possible.
Randomize
