So I think I might still secretly love him despite the ass licking...
Hey ass licking is a very nice and intimate thing! Don't discredit your feelings
But what if he licks everyones ass?
the condom got lost in my hair
Im eating ham and mustard naked, watching south park, but its totally cool cuz the paper plate is covering my nuts
she had the hairiest bush ive ever seen. it looked like a spoiled head of lettuce.
speaking of graduation plans, i'm blacked out eating sausage
Chicken salad taco, you know, when you're out of bread and crackers, and high.
Fuck Sunday funday. Fuck real pants. Fuck the sun. Fuck Jameson. Fuck my life. Yes, I am hungover as shit sitting in my office eating bacon.
Almost there.
define "almost". like I have enough time to watch a youtube video or oh shit, put on some goddamn pants because they're in the driveway.
She wanted to make popcorn, but the air-popper was broken. So she dumped the entire container of kernels into the clothes dryer. Drunk movie night was a success!
I woke up to see that I had ripped my boxers into a loin cloth because we were watching last of the mohicans
I'm just chillin on the bathroom floor
Haha oh no
The bathroom floor is like my second bedroom on the weekends
YOU CANT FOOL THE TOILET
The spirit of America is being too hungover to celebrate America right?
He's got a british accent, a tounge ring, and he's wearing an eye patch... Of corse I'm fucking him
Oh and sorry for almost killing all of us last night... twice...
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