The new Black Eyed Peas song is the stupidest shit I've heard since the last Black Eyed Peas song.
I feel like I am becoming dumber sitting here in class than I would be sitting on the couch smoking weed.
I googled Canada's legal age of consent. I have good news. It's 14. Justin Bieber here I come...
I wasn't trying to make you feel bad, I just agreed with you that your life does suck.
i took my goldfish out of his bowl last night and put him in my bed
i've already watched her fall off the steps, walk up on our porch and try to dance with the dog, and stumble across the street to stand outside the neighbors window...is it taking it too far to watch this rando girl and some guy have sex behind our parking lot now?
just heard a tri-delta girl talking about her drunken escapades last weekend...it's like the exact plotline to a hardcore porno.
Def drinking wine from a 4 liter jug at 11 am. If i call you in 20 years talking about 12 steps, please trace is back to this moment.
I just found a plastic cup with panties inside of it. Let's play CSI.
Oh god. It's like a broken faucet. My guts sound like a bilge pump clogged with golf balls and cake frosting.
I'm lowering my standards just so I can get laid, but I draw the line when a guy spells cool kewl
Please explain why there is a video of you peeing in the Taco Bell bathroom on my phone? Also why did you wink at the end?
I'm really glad that we can be casual hook up buddies. This is a true friendship. Now, please convince your roommate to do the same. Thanks.
Ok well i was gonna say you can only borrow my fog machine if you will use it to emerge from your room in a cloud of smoke after having sex with sarah, so yeah we're good
Lets just say the phase, What a dick, has a whole new meaning at the urinals.
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